~ WHISPERING GALLERY ~

The Portion

With the Chennai chronicles hanging on for long and Around that time being a story of the yester years. I'm being tempted to tell all a new story, probably because this story is very close to me!! What ever be it, I'm about to tell you another story, hope you like it... and any suggestion at any point - ALWAYS WELCOME.

Do you believe in destiny? Could destiny be the reason for all that happens to us - every minute ,every second in this life span are we being led through this life ?

Hold on to your thoughts as Raksha tries to find answers to all these and more ...

The Portion awaits you..

Liar

Shallow me, shallow my lies

i bet you read it in my eyes

under my skin, under my bone

you wonder - into what I've grown!

In truth i always lie to you

I lie , I lie again - so true

deceiver, dissembler but wise

every lie is a sin, i realize.

This can't be termed betrayal

as i recreate your portrayal

as you sow, so you reap

but wish i don't hurt you deep.

~ chetana.N

Life of purpose

ಎಲ್ಲೋ ಹುಡುಕಿದೆ ಇಲ್ಲದ ದೇವರ
ಕಲ್ಲು ಮಣ್ಣುಗಳ ಗುಡಿಯೊಳಗೆ
ಇಲ್ಲೇ ಇರುವ ಪ್ರೀತಿ ಸ್ನೇಹಗಳ
ಗುರುತಿಸದಾದೆನು ನಮ್ಮೊಳಗೇ

ಹತ್ತಿರವಿದ್ದು ದೂರ ನಿಲ್ಲುವೆವು
ನಮ್ಮ ಅಹಮ್ಮಿನ ಕೋಟೆಯಲಿ
ಎಷ್ಟು ಕಷ್ಟವೋ ಹೊಂದಿಕೆ ಎಂಬುದು
ನಾಲ್ಕು ದಿನದ ಈ ಬದುಕಿನಲಿ

ಎಲ್ಲಿದೆ ನಂದನ ಎಲ್ಲಿದೆ ಬಂಧನ
ಎಲ್ಲ ಇವೆ ಈ ನಮ್ಮೊಳಗೇ
ಒಳಗಿನ ತಿಳಿಯನು ಕಲಕದೆ ಇದ್ದರೆ
ಅಮೃತದ ಸವಿ ಇದೆ ನಾಲಿಗೆಗೆ

ಜಿ. ಎಸ್. ಶಿವರುದ್ರಪ್ಪ.

Makes me wonder what was going on in the mind of G.S.Shivarudrappa when he was penning this master piece. The search one goes through in a lifetime finding answers to many questions that are constantly stirred in the mind is immense. Then there is a moment when effortlessly you just have answers to all questions, when one comes across such a moment (and he/she is a poet at heart) then, one can pen in such marvelous work.

All the paths in life lead you, none holding you back if you experience any set back it exists in your mind. Mind is the wonderful master and the worst slave, the very understanding and the very compelling,the inculpable delinquent. As long as you don't get confused and mix up - all around you is beautiful and sweet. The wise realize everything dwells in oneself and the search beyond is insignificant.

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts.

http://www.caswath.com/gallery/audio/ello-hudukide.mp3
click on this link to hear this poem being sung by the unbeatable C.Aswath
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/G._S._Shivarudrappa
Click on this link to know more about G.S. Shivarudrappa.

Question Maze - 4

Long time since i wrote something in question maze.Although I'm constantly questioned by myself I couldn't put forth many of those questions in public on a blog( personal question issues!!).But this link sent by a friend put my thoughts back to action. (here's the link in case you wanna read the original) MANUSCRIPT.

The question raised in the article was "are languages merely tools for expressing our thoughts, or do they actually shape our thoughts?"

Language is central to our experience of being human.Each language is distinctive in its approach. Could this difference create a difference in the way the thoughts map in our mind? ?It's true,mind can be trained-is it the language we speak that's training our minds?? Does the way you describe an object or an experience depends on the language you speak? If yes, then doesn't language interfere in the way we see,understand and absorb the happenings around us(that's a little creepy isn't it?)

Language's could differ from one other vividly or they could share something in common and with so many known languages world wide how easy is it to differentiate behavior in thought? If it's sounding like insanity, don't think so cos there are people who would go to any levels of insanity for research purposes[;)].Today we live in a world that's shrunk by many folds, making research's such as these a reality.

(Here's one paragraph from the manuscript) Does treating chairs as masculine and beds as feminine in the grammar make Russian speakers think of chairs as being more like men and beds as more like women in some way? It turns out that it does. In one study, we asked German and Spanish speakers to describe objects having opposite gender assignment in those two languages. The descriptions they gave differed in a way predicted by grammatical gender. For example, when asked to describe a "key" — a word that is masculine in German and feminine in Spanish — the German speakers were more likely to use words like "hard," "heavy," "jagged," "metal," "serrated," and "useful," whereas Spanish speakers were more likely to say "golden," "intricate," "little," "lovely," "shiny," and "tiny." To describe a "bridge," which is feminine in German and masculine in Spanish, the German speakers said "beautiful," "elegant," "fragile," "peaceful," "pretty," and "slender," and the Spanish speakers said "big," "dangerous," "long," "strong," "sturdy," and "towering." This was true even though all testing was done in English, a language without grammatical gender. The same pattern of results also emerged in entirely nonlinguistic tasks (e.g., rating similarity between pictures). And we can also show that it is aspects of language per se that shape how people think: teaching English speakers new grammatical gender systems influences mental representations of objects in the same way it does with German and Spanish speakers. Apparently even small flukes of grammar, like the seemingly arbitrary assignment of gender to a noun, can have an effect on people's ideas of concrete objects in the world.

It means that when you're learning a new language, you're not simply learning a new way of talking, you are also inadvertently learning a new way of thinking.The more number of languages you learn, the more varied your thinking( that's how i like to presume.) Now that is something to think about!!!!!

Eternal sunshine of the Spotless Mind

This is inspired by the movie by the same name eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, starring Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet. The genre is Romantic/Comedy, though i'm doubtful about the comedy part (seriously!!).

The branches swing to the wind

the flowers sing with the bees

in their divine self they find

an admirer with such ease.

The mountains and the heaven above

the sunlight clasping the earth

They are distinct yet in love

such sweet emotions forming a girth.

Time plays it's wicked games

slowly the love is it's slave

once beautiful is now in flames

sending all memories to the grave.

Erasing a smile wrecks the heart

reminding you of the very beginning

but the decision is made and you need to part

as the differences are winning.

It's a new day, a new start

you know not what's in your past

determined to find a thriving heart

you meet her again at last.

All that's gone is the thought

which could be considered only a part

as it's essence is present

sealed in the tenderness of the heart

holding your hands, turn the page

leading us to where we are meant to be

in true love we both engage

like the moonbeams kissing the sea.

~ Chetana.N

Marina @ Twilight

Feeling the warm sand alongside the ocean

i gaze at the sky, a hundred clouds in motion.

piled beneath the winds, as the vapors drew

beautifully tainted in colors of summer hue.

The glossy sky fades into the night

transforming into further wonderful sight

a soft, sweet fragrance in the air

spreading its magic every where.

After all the turmoil of the day

the ocean sets in the mood to play

and the waves weaved a pleasant tune

as they rise to kiss the moon.

Happiness

Today's newspaper had one of the most desperately seeking surprises for me, a British Psychiatrist had discovered the formula for HAPPINESS. My thoughts were getting wild as i began reading the article, it was after the initial 2 paragraphs i was told that yesterday i.e., 18th June - according to the calculations turns out to be the highest rated due to peaking happiness factors such as warm summer outdoors, seeing friends more frequently and excitement about holidays. I was very happy to read it but hold on let's just rewind to yesterday and cross check if it was true in my life?? warm summer outdoors ( a big x mark )... it was cloudy n drizzling few times in the day, i didn't meet any of my friends and nor am i excited about a holiday. O+(N x S)+Cpm/T+He (the deduced formula for happiness) had no reference in my life (at least not on 18th July).

My thought process didn't just stop there (as usual), what is it that makes me HAPPY then? I seek answer to this question since a long long time but today was the day where i had a slot dedicated to think about it... HAPPINESS - the feeling where you have a light heart and your brain activity is less, all that your eyes see is beauty and you feel your dancing to your favorite song (though most of it just your imagination as your lost in the happiness). Happy is the word, i have always been chasing but how far have i succeeded in grabbing it? I've turned a year older year after year and year after year my happiness has been linked with different objects. When i was a kid a slice of raw mango, playing on the road with other kids until its late night, a pretty pink frock, a chocolate, sitting on my dad's lap, hiding my mischief from mom ( which i miserably fail till date.) would bring immense joy. As a teenager my bicycle, swim in the pool, riding my dad's bike, partying with friends, going out for ice-creams, winning house events in the school, inter-school competitions, feeling the breeze at the desolated airport would rise my heart beat. Now that I've crossed those years and i'm considered an adult now, i'm more confused than ever. It's toughest to identify what makes me happy now?

As i think deeper, i realize that the quenched feeling i had as i started writing this post, didn't exist now. The happy memory had turned me happy yet again. I was not playing hide-n-seek or riding or partying but the memories that live inside me had played their trick, I was happy again !! (just like a iron filling acquires magnetic property in close encounter with a magnet, i had struck happiness chord just remembering the happy moments.) I'm yet to figure out what gives me immense pleasure and keeps me happy today but the happy news is i can find the trigger to my happiness being HAPPY in the fond memories of yesterday. before i sign of from this post, i would like to share a few lines i read long ago. When you lead your life being happy, it becomes memorable. (no reference to who wrote it, sorry !!)

ME, Myself

There is a special place in life,
that needs my humble skill,
A certain job I'm meant to do,
which no one else can fulfill

The time will be demanding,
and the pay is not too good
And yet I wouldn't change it
for a moment -- even if I could

There is a special place in life,
a goal I must attain,
A dream that I must follow,
because I won't be back again.

There is a mark that I must leave,
however small it seems to be,
A legacy of love for those
who follow after me

There is a special place in life,
that only I may share,
A little path that bears my name,
awaiting me somewhere.

There is a hand that I must hold,
a word that I must say,
A smile that I must give
for there are tears to blow away

There is a special place in life
that I was meant to fill
A sunny spot where flowers grow,
upon a windy hill.

There's always a tomorrow
and the best is yet to be,
And somewhere in this world,
I know there is a place for me.

pics of longdrive

Give Me A Loan Today

Give Me A Loan Today!

When he borrowed money yesterday afternoon his wife cheered, “we’ll get that new car pretty soon!” They danced in a circle then fell to the floor “hey maybe they can loan us just a little bit more!” We need new appliances and a trip to France! lets ask the bank for another loan in advance They got all their money fast and on time and it took only 3 months to spend every dime When the statement came in, with the money all gone they thought, “gheesh, that sure didn’t take very long” NOW how would they pay off that high interest debt? then remembered they have one big credit card left “we’ll take from Peter to pay off Paul” until we can finally pay it off all… they searched and searched until they found a new lender who said, “we don’t care that you’re a big spender” They breathed a sigh of temporary relief, promised it was time to turn over a new leaf “Financial Responsibility”, was their latest motto an example to set for their children to follow No more cars, toys, games or unnecessary things, no more computers, tools, or fake diamond rings, no more trips, furniture, flooring, or nights out, they stayed home they were disciplined they took the honorable route Four years have passed with their debt fully paid and now they’ve decided to sell their home and upgrade They called their bank to qualify for another home loan and were approved in five minutes, right there on the phone. What is the moral of this loan moaner tale? “Our bad habits can change, we aren’t destined to fail, with our life back on track, we can relax and exhale”.

by Barbara Tremblay Cipak

Dream Catcher

Dreams have always been an integral part of my life, in ways i can never express in mere words. Each time they have embraced these eyes, they have turned me up side down and bought out a new me(whom i never knew existed in me). I wish i had more time to write some original piece of poetry on dreams but alas.. life's moving so fast and there's no time to relax and unwind. I dedicate this beautiful poem by sarojini naidu to those wonderful dreamy feelings :)

Once in the dream of a night I stood
Lone in the light of a magical wood,
Soul-deep in visions that poppy-like sprang;
And spirits of Truth were the birds that sang,
And spirits of Love were the stars that glowed,
And spirits of Peace were the streams that flowed
In that magical wood in the land of sleep.

Lone in the light of that magical grove,
I felt the stars of the spirits of Love
Gather and gleam round my delicate youth,
And I heard the song of the spirits of Truth;
To quench my longing I bent me low
By the streams of the spirits of Peace that flow
In that magical wood in the land of sleep.

~ Sarojini Naidu

Love to me

Happy new year.. Hope 2010 will be all that you hope and pray for...

The remaining parts of Chennai Chronicle will soon arrive, until then hope you might enjoy reading my thoughts about this one all time favorite question of mine, why do girls fall for the wrong guy?Is there some kind of attraction towards the fatal? not alone that, you fall in love with the wrong guy and cry about it, try harder then ever to forget him but in vain. Why does love have to be so complicated?

Is it always the love with the wrong, thats complicated? or are the one's made for each other also experience complicated love? lemme not complicate it with too many questions. Let's try finding some answers here.. Firstly, why do girls fall for wrong guys, the answer would be - with a hope to find the right one - trial and error method i guess... Then why doesn't she dump him once she know's he's not right. cos' they are stupid enough to think that they have the power vested in them to change this wrong guy into their Mr.Right just like in fairy tales. Alas, life is no fairy tale...

Next let's talk about the fatal attraction, i guess it comes very naturally to humans. We are attracted to everything that could kill us, it excites us. Else we wouldn't have snake fighters, wrestlers, formula one racers, sky divers, deep sea divers. What say? so a girl developing liking to a wrong guy and getting into a hollow relationship isn't an impossible task,i say. and hey, if the guy was wrong for the girl what about the vice versa rule?

Love and complications are not as complicated as they seem. I've noticed few simple lovers too i would like to classify them into three categories(if i have left out any category and you would want me to add please let me know about it. ) namely -the lead-follow lover's : here one person leads and the other merely follows ( now who leads and who follows is not an issue) and no problem arises between them. Secondly, there's open lover's : Here it doesn't bother the partner's what each other do in their personal life. They appear understanding and very matured to the outside world. The chances of complications are less in this kinda relationships too. The final one True Lover's :who accept their partner's for what ever they are and both partner's are true to each other ( do we find such people in the world today?? I'm still looking!!)

Don't you think all this simple explanations of complicated love and complicated explanation of simple love is actually ******* .. That's what i feel too. Any person could be right/wrong it all depends on the perspective. Make sure the feelings are genuine from both ends and just love each other, remember to change with time but never change your feelings for one other, you grow old but don't let your love.Most important of all, understand your partner is another human being who has a life, a job, parents, siblings, friends, colleagues, stress, tension, hair fall, weight problem,height problem, fairness problem, allergy, ulcer, cold, fever, throat infection, malaria, cholera, blood pressure, blood sugar,body pain, needs, wants, desires,responsibilities... just like you do!

Chennai chronical - II

23/10/2009

16:20 walking home i met rahul, i wanted to ignore him but couldn't stop myself.

Hi .. How are you?

.....

I've been calling you ... Why aren't you responding?

.......

........

I should have sent about 50 sms. Couldn't you reply to just one?

Are you never gonna talk to me??

Atleast your fine walking next to me!

Am I walking too fast for you? Do you want me to slow down? Why are you staring at me? Spell out a word. It's been 2 days I've heard your voice.

Aaah !! now we are reaching your home. If you don't speak now, I'll come with you and talk to your dad. you're leaving me with no options. Speak now damn it!!

I'm off to Chennai tonight with Raksha to see Rosey. I'll talk to you once I'm back. Is it ok?

Will you promise to take care of yourself and call me twice everyday?

I don't think so..

Atleast an sms will do.

If I find the time, I will.

I shall wait for you to come back, back from Chennai, back to yourself, back to me, back to us ... I'm sure you're mine .. and nothing can change this feeling.

Bye my love, have a safe trip.

Don't just stare, please smile so that i can be relaxed knowing you're fine. Now you go, I'll stand here till you enter the house.

.....

What took you so long to get home? How were you're internals? Are you hungry, Do you want me to serve you lunch or you ate out? Will answer any of my questions or remain dumb? I'm talking to you Priya... What happened? Internals were good? Come on don't worry, you'll have the aggregate. Are you going to say something?

Reply to me... Don't just shut the door.

You're father is to be blamed for giving you so much freedom .. Now you don't think it's necessary to reply to my questions. I'm gonna talk to him tonight for sure. ( in a raised voice)

18:00 knock !! knock !!

Here have some tea and biscuits... Why is your travel bag out? Why does it seem to be packed?

Me and Raksha are missing Rosey a lot, so we are planning a surprise visit to see her.

Who's taking you girls to Chennai? Did you talk to your dad about this?

We have booked the 09:45 pm bus to chennai , Rajahamsa. It'll be comfortable. Don't worry mom we will manage.

Why didn't you tell before? Were you intending to surprise us too leaving home without informing?

come on mom... It's not like what you thinking... you know.

Do as you wish .. now you're old enough to make you're decisions. Why do you need to ask our permission?

I'll make some sandwiches for the journey. Don't forget to pack your tooth brush .. Take sufficient clothes .. Be careful at the beaches there.

I'm not a kid anymore mom... I'll takecare don't worry.

20:00 Raksha arrives in an auto, we sit down enjoy the hot chapathis and curry mom has made.

My mobile beeps .. there's one more sms from rahul ..

Are you ready to leave? Have you packed everything? Can I see you off at the bus stand?

Why do i have to bear with two mom's ?? I switch off my phone.

Have you taken the chargers ... ??

Yes..

How about beach wear?? You have taken them na...

Yes..

Sun tan lotion ???

Yes meri amma .. I've packed it all.

Do you think we need to call Rosey and tell her we will be there tomorrow in the morning?

No .. let's stick to the previous plan. You have her address right.

Yeh...

Be careful .. Do call us once you land at Chennai bus stand. Talk in Tamil as much as possible. Call me if you need any help, i'll call in pandeyan uncle and ask him to help you girls.

Sure dad ...

We wash hands and head to the bus stand in an auto.

21:00 The bus stand is crowded with people, all of them waiting to get into a bus in order to reach a destination.

We look for the bus...

Has the 9:45 Bangalore to Chennai Rajahamsa arrived??

Yes .. it's right there ..

Thank you sir ..

Let's get on.. take the tickets out ..

It's seats 19 and 20 right ..

I guess so...

hmmm... finally here we are ... all on our own for the next two days.. don't throw you're bag ... you can place it up.

Who cares .. ?? Raksha i just want this trip to be one of it's kind and something to remember for a life time.

get me your ipod .. i wanna listen to some music until the bus leaves the station.

to be continued ....

Chennai chronical - I

23/10/09

7:00 it's such a lazy day. Aaahhhh !! i wish i could sleep for long....

Priya, come on get up!! you're already late for class. will you

get up now or you want me to come there to kick you.

Can anyone ignore mom's orders? i get up, make my bed and

push myself into the bathroom.

7:30 Right on time at the bus stop, 10 more mins before the bus can arrive.

I look around, not a soul i know. I put on my ear plugs and listen to my play list. I try calling Raksha, she doesn't respond....

I walk around, the ticket counter is open ..

I quickly open my purse, i got only 600 rupees in them.

How much for a rajahamsa ticket to chennai ?

What date do you intend to book the ticket for?

Tonight ... !!

Lemme check, it's weekend and not many seats will be available. You have seats available

on 09:45 pm bus . How many tickets do you want me to book for you?

Two please.

seats 19 and 20 are available, is it ok?

That's fine.

ok .. here is your ticket to Chennai, departuring time from Bangalore 21:45 dated 23rd October 2009.

210 has already arrived, i ran to catch it with tickets and change tightly grabbed in my

hand. it's a lucky day, i didn't miss out my bus.

9:00 Internals are no longer a serious affair, everyone's chilled out. I wait for the questions to be given. saritha mam comes in - hands over twelve questions. Write any six of these before 10:30.

She leaves..

Open book and open discussion makes it all the more easier.

11:10 Raksha is the most irresponsible, one last time and if she doesn't answer my call I'm just going on my own

Finally you choose to pick my call, that's wonderful.

I was stuck with work, had guests at home.

That's ok. I'm in the bus and almost reaching your home. Please come and pick me up.

Give me 5 minutes.

sure.

11:35 Hop on let's go, it's already late..

After 20 minutes of making me wait in the bus stop you realise we are late?

Let's not argue... where do you want to go first?

I've booked the tickets, now lets shop for some eatables, clothes and then drop me home.. I'm tired and equally sleepy.. haven't slept in a week preparing for the internals.

Come on.. it's a open book internals and you're finding it hard to cope with??

13 :00 Now that we are done with most of the shopping. Do you want to have lunch?

No let me go home..

Why??

I got work, haven't packed .. no sleep.. need to install a DVD RW .. and blah.. blah.. blah..

I'm dying of hunger, let's eat.

No.. let's go

But we still need to buy sweets and chappals for Rosey.

We have done so much shopping.. let's not do anymore.

She needs it yaar ..

I have spent almost every penny, I got nothing to spend on the trip

Why do you worry when me and Rosey are there?? Let's grab some good food at Nandhini. The next three days at Chennai is gonna be horrible in terms of weather and food.

14:00 C ya at 8 pm . I'll come home with all my luggage, you be ready, the bus leaves Bangalore at 21:45.

to be continued ...

Post Cards

Daily Greeting Cards

These were the cards i recently designed.. or rather i would say many people and things in and around me inspired me to come up with these designs. I'm very grateful to all of them. They looked great when i got them printed, you're seeing it now pls dont forget to lemme know wat u think of them. :) :)

Beginning of something new

An evening filled with smile

and emotions so versatile

there was a certain ease

and moments filled with tease.

This was our first meet

and everything felt complete

i never thought I'd feel this way

I'm glad we met here today.

For long we've been-unseen friends

this is where the anonymity ends

the moment that appears ideal

is our journey towards 'the real'.

It is an experience mesmerising

something we should keep on repeating

so let's make another quick plan

to carry forward from where it all began.

~~ Chetana.N

Yet unknown